愛笑的眼睛...

Currently having my EEs now!!! but didnt really study much because I keep slacking =.=

Basically, I just realized I gained a lot from life experiences in all sort of field. I know it may sound weird to you but trust me it ias really what I learned. I have to change from how i used to be. I had learn that saying and doing seems contrast. Some people think that saying it in a polite way will make you doesn't feel hurts. SORRY MAN! I am not going to listen to lies. Tells me the truth and at least I will feel real after hearing it....Whatever you said just trying to cover the "not interested in you" truth. THANKS FOR USING ME :) I KNOW I BECAME USELESS IN THE END THATS WHY THINGS HAPPENS BUT I LEARN SOMETHING NEW IN LIFE Words and action are like walls, after you hits it, you will only feel the pain but trust me after you heal, YOU WILL SEE THINGS so much differently... It doesn't works between us is because what we see in life is different and it is just something impossible to happen. Yet, you think that everything is gonna end the same way but sorry you are wrong, every situation in life is different.

AND I REALIZED ONE IMPORTANT THING IN LIFE... NOT TO REPEAT THE HISTORY BECAUSE IT IS STUPID TO DO THE SAME THING... END UP YOU WILL BE GETTING HURT THE SAME WAY!!!!!!

Actually, I really want to thanks you for letting me hitting the wall so hard to realized that how STUPID I USED TO BE !!!!!!!!

I AM NO LONGER THE STUPID ONE BECAUSE LESSON LEARNED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D

off to study :D

Last Embrace....

After a week of happiness, my mood got back!!!!! The feeling is back!!! taught it had gone away long long time ago.... it come back for no reason!!! why am i so dumb and stupid?? it is gone la weih!!!!! I shouldn't even bother about it because this is not even my responsibility.... always have to try to live to please someone...screw that!!! you are no longer the one i suppose to care about!!! you are just passer-by and i am not suppose to make any effort to let you stay because it is not how it suppose to be!!!!!! go away because i know i cannot have it and i dont need it anymore!!!!

When we look up the sky, we saw a different view!!!

"YOU ARE NOT THE ONE" I have to tell this to myself everyday!!!!!!

We are from different world!!!!!

Sometimes, a FAKE smile could really cover everything!!!!! lets fake it all the way until the end of all these!!! because this is the only thing that could make me feel like I AM ALRIGHT!!!!!!!

btw, thanks all my friends that wishes me on my birthday :) and those special one who bought me the present!!! I really love the shoe so much!!!!

August.....

time to get serious about all sort of things.... i really need to get myself out depression and be true... it is hurting and i couldnt handle it anymore... those fake smile and no meaning of caring all should be gone!!!!! this is not how i am suppose to be actually!!!! i should be the real mine....i should not need someone that doesnt need me!!!! if the chances is there probably i am leaving all these by next month... gonna go some where far and some where new to have a new life!!!!! i dont like these kind of life... it just keep bothering me!!!!! urgh!!!! i know where i stay and i know where i should be!!!!! i wont let any single person to do the same thing to me again!!!!! it is just too much.... i know i have my bros that understand the feelings... what other said , i wont bother anymore because i believe family will tell me everything and those who really know how much they mean to me.... i will not let anything bad to ruin my month!!! august!!!!!

i hope everything will be very peaceful this month and yet nothing gonna bother me at this months... and it is a very buzy months!!!!! i hope august would be great :) no one gonna break me down again!!!!!!!

Lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala

Feel like blogging suddenly!!!!!!! Ugh!!!! I am so freaking tired today!!!! Woke up very early today because have to go to pray on the morning... Ahhhhh!!!!! I am still slacking =.= !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Btw, few more days till school starts!!!!!!!! Ahhhh!!!!! So excited yet just dont seems like going!!!!!!
Ahhh!!!!!!!! What's wrong with me????



I am seriously miserable for the whole holiday... Feel very empty yet boring!!!!! I am really miserable ah!!!!!!! Hate myself ah!!!!! Wtf!!!!!!!!!! Control a bit ah please!!!!!


Btw, need to plan something on 5th august...



A lot things coming up!!!! Really have to give all in now!!!! Time to focus and be serious on what I am doing!!!!!!!


Seriously don't know how to move on!!!! :O

Speechless...

Haihz, really feel sleepy but yet couldn't sleep at all!!!! Ugh, what's wrong with me???? =.= doesn't really feeling well ah!!!! Everything doesn't seems right at all!!!! I don't like it !!!! But what can I do? Just gonna leave it alone ah!!!!! Let everything to be like how it suppose be because it is pointless trying so hard when it is so not real!!!!! Hate myself being so stubborn!!!! Urghhhhh!!!! Fuck la!!!!! I just wanna change but how???? Haihz, it just seems impossible to do it.




Things seems complicated when you say something and you don't mean it!!!!! Easy to say it out loud but it is just so hard to mean it....

A lot of things just very hard to say it out but sometimes I feel like breaking it out but I just can't !!!!! Ahhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!! Ughhhhh!!!!!!! Gonna burst out one day!!!! Ahhhhh!!!!!!!!!




Need time to recover!!!!!! Gonna try to force myself to sleep!!!!!

Holiday

Time flies... So fast it have been the 2nd week of holiday!!! Didn't really do much other then went for movie on saturday... Have been sleeping late this weeks... Have been thinking a lot at night... Couldn't really sleep well too.... Hmmmph, it really seems hard... Hope this week will be better and hope college gonna start off great!!!! That's all I wish for...


Things turns complicated when you say something it seems easy but it is so hard to meant it and do it.... Haihz... I really hope some miracles will happens now!!! I don't like those feelings. It just seems not real!!! I want what is real and what belongs to me!!!!! haihzzzz....


Gotta get some rest now

Night

一片痴

Everything seems to be fine for me now because I am trying to get back to my own original life...thats really who I am actually. No matter how unwilling to let go, I have to try to let it be... I cannot be always live in the dream because it is not the reality. People may taught it is not a big deal but for me it is. For something that means everything to you, you have let it go in a sudden is hard but yet I believe in time... Time flush thing away. Let thing be how it because it was a dreams.... You cannot always wish for dream come true because you yourself will end up getting hurt... No matter how much it is, in the end it will still be an end because that's make life interesting... For all the thing I've had done, it is just ways to please you... So no point appreciate it...

Anyway, 2 weeks holiday started. My first day was boring... Sit at my grandpa office to help out. Most of the time I am just sitting there and watch :P


That's all for the day :) night :)